Don't you just hate when you realize you are procrastinating like a champion? I don't like procrastinating. However, I seem to keep doing it. And it puts me on edge because I'm in a moment of my life when I have lots of free time (actually, all of it) which allows me to do EVERYTHING I want (well, sort of. The free ones). Yet again, I don't do it. I spend hours (if I was to put them all together, they would be days in a row) sitting in front of my laptop (or iPod touch) watching what others do and make instead of actually doing something myself. For instance, I love Pinterest and flickr. Oh! and Instagram -the Holy Trinity-, which are all image-based. I get wildly inspired. I get so many good ideas, I can even feel them bubbling inside my head. But do you see me taking pics or attempting any craft projects? Nope. Neither do I. Reading is another delicate matter. I run a Facebook page for others to show their books (in case you don't know it yet, here it is, likes are welcomed!, also pics) but I don't seem to be able to actually read one book from front to back. I download and buy books constantly, as I find topics of interest (biographies, historical, novels, that's my stuff) on my daily internet surfing/readings, but I read one chapter, just a few pages and I need to leave it and jump to the next best thing, which is another book I'm eager to read (and I have tons of them). Repeat endlessly.

I would love to dabble a little in water colours, learn the technique, improve it. And keep on making my scrapbooks, which are an instant source of joy and entertainment. And I'd love to finish, sorry, start some projects that have been sitting on my mind for months. And test some handmade designs for the covers of my notebooks. And I don't do any of those things. Instead, I procrastinate. I am massstering it. I also believe I have some kind of ADD, because I can't spend more than 15 or 20 minutes focused on ONE thing. Or maybe it's just my anxiety saying "Hi!" (most definitely).

Sometimes I wonder how did I manage to read so many books -or even study!- years ago and the answer was at hand: there was no social media around to "waste" time in. Because only having internet access didn't use to feel like a giant hoover had sucked me and my whole attention in. No. Sometimes I even felt like it was of no use (up until I opened my first blog in 2005). Social media is my poison, the soft drugs (when did I get this dramatic? chillax!). They are supossed to serve me as inspiration and connection with people but lately I am more of a viewer than a participant. Not to mention a maker, and that worries me. I dislike it tremendously. I want to do and make stuff, not just watch, sitting on a chair, what others achieve.

Anyway, sorry for the rant. I needed to get it out of my system somehow. Question is: are you a viewer or a participant? Allow me to make me a cup of tea and I'm all yours!

I know, I said I had come back, and then I stopped posting altogether again. Blogging is just a hobby for so many of us. I've no idea if there's someone really there, reading, except the two of three people I know for certain (because one even asked me to come back, thank you!, kiss kiss!). Anyway, do I have anything worthy to tell? Uhm. Oh, I could tell you about my latest obessions. I'm always obsessed with something. An album, a film, an actor, a topic, Instagram, you name it. Anything can obsess me out of the blue. It catches me off guard and suddenly I'm full on googgling, spending insanely amounts of time listening, watching, reading about the obsessing item of the hour. For instance:

- i spent an entire day listening to this song on repeat. If I had to leave home for whatever reason, I would listen to it on my mobile. Yes, on repeat. And its video is also very interesting.

- since July 15th, the very day I discovered this film on cable TV (on a random zapping frenzy post nerve wrecking and disappointing world cup final) to today i guess I must have watched it like 3 dozens of times. Crazy, I know. I even watched it twice one day (or more). I can't help it, i love it with all my heart. His performance is brilliant (he was only 17!), and why not say it? he's so handsome. I also discovered I had a instant liking for that musical era and style, which wasn't new to me but I learnt more about it. I dig it. Hand me some eyeshadow, will ya?

also.

It was my birthday on Tuesday. I turned 30 flipping 4. How can this be possible? So, that came along with a proper obsession (which had began a few days before). Sort of a mid life fashion crisis, and I went to get myself a nice out-of-the-ordinary hat to show and prove that I may be older but i will not tolerate anyone calling me "mrs". I hate when people refer to me as "mrs". Step aside and think of what you've done, mister! Awful.

The next day, already a mid 30's young lady, my obsession said present! and made me - I swear, it has a life of its own!- go buy a trench. It had to be mine. It fits so perfectly (my budget begs to difer) that it would have been a shame not to get it. It had been waiting for me in the shop window for days. I love when things wait for me. Because people don't.

ok, 34, let's hear it. what do you have aligned for me? it'd better be mind blowing, you bastard!